Artist: Tub Ring
Song: Cryonic Love Song
Album: Secret Handshakes
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Why this song is awesome:
Sleeping like a snowman / Solid as a block of ice / Will you still remember me / When we’re both five hundred and five?
Robot love song. ‘Nuff said.
Artist: TV On The Radio
Song: Will Do
Album: Nine Types of Light
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Why this song is awesome:
If you ever want to set the mood, put on this song.
If you ever want to ruin the mood, fart.
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P.S. This line is A+:
My love / What choice of words will take me back to you?
Artist: The Strokes
Song: Fear of Sleep
Album: First Impressions of Earth
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Why this song is awesome:
Who can sing like he’s falling asleep and still make your mind shoot sparks? Julian Casablancas, that’s who. And sharp lines like this are exactly why:
I guess everybody’s week must have been pretty rough / Cause everybody is drunk, loud, and pissed off / I know you hate to be impressed with someone else (other than yourself) / But you know, trying to hold back on being an asshole helps
Artist: Them Crooked Vultures
Song: Gunman
Album: Them Crooked Vultures
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Why this song is awesome:
This lyric is just dripping with attitude:
It don’t matter / Don’t try to explain / You’re just another dog to be trained / Choke chained
Josh Homme could look you straight in the eye and tell you he’d just eaten everything in your fridge and taken a dump in all your shoes and you’d still think he was the coolest motherfucker alive.
Artist: Foxy Shazam
Song: I Like It
Album: tbc
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Why this song is awesome:
For days, Foxy Shazam had been posting random pictures on Facebook of black women with enormous asses, and I was very confused. Then they released this song and laughed my head off. Listen to these lyrics:
That’s the biggest black ass I’ve ever seen / And I like it! I like it!
Who else but Eric Sean Nally could get away with singing that? I’m in love with this band.
Artist: Scars On Broadway
Song: Chemicals
Album: Scars On Broadway
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Why this song is awesome:
It’s hard to imagine that Daron wasn’t on some sort of hallucinogen when he wrote this song. There’s only one way to describe how he sounds as he sings/gargles Like we were LOVAAARRRRRSSSSS, which is deranged. But it’s a delightful kind of deranged. Like a serial killer with the personality of Ellen DeGeneres.
Best lyric:
“I grabbed your ass under the covers.”
Artist: Spiritualized
Song: Ladies And Gentlemen We Are Floating In Space
Album: Ladies And Gentlemen We Are Floating In Space
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Why this song is awesome:
This is probably my favourite love song ever. Especially that warbly, gorgeous voice singing these lines:
I will love you till I die / And I will love you all the time / So please put your sweet hand in mine / And float in space and drift in time
If this song doesn’t give you that warm and fuzzy feeling inside, then you’re probably made of stone. And that’s pretty amazing, because stones are usually inanimate.
Artist: Panic at the Disco
Song: That Green Gentleman (Things Have Changed For Me)
Album: Pretty, Odd
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Why this song is awesome:
I feel entitled to dislike Panic at the Disco the same way I feel entitled to dislike Theory of a Creedleback. It’s just fun because you can laugh about it with so many people.
Nevertheless, I’ve always had a big weak spot for this song. It’s so damn Beatles-y, and totally cheers me up whenever I hear it. Especially this line:
Things have changed for me / and that’s okay
Artist: Mr. Bungle
Song: Sweet Charity
Album: California
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Why this song is awesome:
I always picture this song playing in the hallways of some tropical insane asylum to mellow out the patients.
And this slight lyrical shift is a really clever way of showing how the line between religious and crazy is often paper thin:
Save me / The heavens have opened / I’m coming home / Sweet charity
Save me / The asylums have opened / I’m coming home / Sweet charity
I’m home free…
Artist: Dimmu Borgir
Song: Gateways
Album: Abrahadabra
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Even if you don’t like metal, just listen to that fantastic insanity in the girl’s voice around 1:30. And the fierce guitar riffage right afterwards.
Dimmu Borgir are the closest thing to what a Castlevania: The Movie soundtrack would sound like if it were real. When I hear this song, I feel like I’m running through a burning castle with a battle-axe chopping demons and roaring like a beast.
And the melody and lyrics here are EPIC:
Be the broken or the breaker/ Be the giver or the undertaker/ Unlock and open the door/ Be the healer or the breaker/ The keys are in your hands/ Realize you are your own source of all creation/ Of your own master plan
I don’t even think English is these guys’ first language. Damn.
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Extra Credit:
Check out this great live performance of Gateways by the KORK orchestra - even if you’re not digging the crazy Norwegian Black Metal, you can probably still appreciate how intricate, exciting, and epic the orchestral arrangement is.
